Top QB's

I have decided to start my breakdown of my personal rankings at the different positions. Since I don't give two shits about defensive players you won't be seeing a list of them. Lets start with the pretty boys. Of all the porcelain dolls that sport a red jersey whom would I most want to captain my fictitious sports dynamo? You have to take many things into account when judging a QB. The two things I focus on most are offense and defense. Let me elaborate. You need to have some good skill around you on the offensive side. Manning is good but could he st records throwing to Bobby Wade or Billy McMullen? Probably not, so good luck if you draft a Vikings QB. The first thing I do is analyze the two things that I think make a successful offensive team: o-line and running game. Wait, what about WR? Doesn't matter if you can't keep the defense honest. Last year we saw the potential emergence of two future stars at the RB position in Maroney and Addai. If you have either of them in a keeper league I commend your foresight. But what they will help most is their QB. Who knew Brady and Manning needed more help? But, you need a line to pave the way for the RB and give the QB time to scan the field so forget about Russell or McNown or Walter or even Ronald Curry if he switches back to his natural position. As far as defense goes it pays to have as little skill on that side as possible. This creates shootouts and lots of points.


So lets take a look at what I have so far.
1. Peyton Manning
Wow! I really went out on a limb on that pick. But wait, there's more. For the first time ever I have two QB's I could justify in the first round, but I digress. Manning has it all. Two pro bowl caliber receivers with a brand new toy in the slot. A stud young RB who is ready to take over the gaping whole left when Edge chased the money to go to RB purgatory. I digress again. Manning also has a line who make it a life's mission to make sure his uniform stays white and ugly. So if you miss out on the big four RB's, that's right, I have a fourth but that is for another day, don't sleep on Manning at #5 if you want a chance at huge points. Oh, he also has a defense that may make it a need for a shootout at any moment.

2. Parson Calmer (sp?)
I know how to spell his name but it has become tradition to mix it up. What does Palmer have going for him this year that makes him worthy of first round consideration? How about a line with two very good tackles, the third best #2 WR in the league and a RB that puts up the most boring 1,300 and 12TDs you have ever seen. I am still not convinced that Marvin Lewis has done enough to put his imprint his style on this defense to avoid the occasional shootout. Remeber San Diego last year?

3. Tom Brady
I have to point out that I am a very biased Patriots fan before you read this. The Patriot have been playing with a list of AFL cast-offs at WR the passed few years and Brady has been better than solid. Rumor has it the Patriots made some moves in the offseason to try and shore up that weakness but I don't need to gloat. Of the top three QB's, I think Brady is the best. So why do I have him at #3? Well because the Patriots have too good of defense. Yeah they may need me to suit up in the secondary at some point this season as their DBs seem to go down more than Kim Kardashian, but Asante Samuel be damned they always find a way. Plus I think that a healthy Maroney will score tons of points so if Maroney goes down I bump Brady up a spot. With a strong running game and a new, flashy WR core, Brady will be able to overcome the lack of shootouts with the smooth consistency of a man that can knock up a smokin' hot babe and move straight to another smokin' hot babe. If that's what you are into.

4. Drew Brees
Every year one of the top rated QB's has a down year. Brees is my choice to be that guy. But if he does have another strong year at least I can act like I expected it. Here are my big concerns with Brees. First, his WR core scares me. Is Colston for real or the reincarnation of Michael Clayton? Will Devery Henderson learn to catch? Can Lendale...I mean Robert Meachem stop eating long enough to get back in shape to play football? So what does Brees have going for him? Well he has two good RB's that will help take the pressure off and a defense, that unless I missed something this offseason, blows worse than Paris Hilton. I mean come on, can she try a little harder when she's on camera? So Brees will produce but he'll have more duds that the three above him.

5. Marc Bulger
I had a tough time deciding between Bulger and Tony Romo. I went with Bulger because he has proven himself in more than just one half season and I trust his stud WR mutch more than I trust Romo's. Plus, I heard Bulger has a decent RB that also helps a lot in the running game. And as John Lopuch from Fanball reminded me, he gets Orlando Pace and Andy Mccollom back this year. Did I mention that they have a disgraceful defense and an offensive minded head coach. Those are the makings of a highly productive fantasy QB.


Honorable Mention:
Tony Romo - I love MBIII, Matt Hasselbeck - healthy, Donovan McNabb - I'd never take him in a million years.

Breakthrough year - Matt Leinart (noodle arm but great WR's and a much better O-line)
Bust - Eli Manning (obvious)
Super Sleeper - Matt Schaub (would love to draft him as my #2 only because of Johnson)


Well there you have it. You may agree or disagree but what do I care, at least I made an effort. What have you done? Look for my RB rankings next week. Be sure to take my rankings with a grain of salt because guys in my league may read this (no one is reading this) so I may throw some curveballs at you to try and cath them. Go Patriots!

p.s. closed circuit to all the idiots out there: if you weren't retarded you would realize that this ranking wasn't the only post in the blog. If you think it is please just go back to your job at the gas station and there is no need to come back.

Let "sleeper" dogs lie

Admit it, every year as the fantasy football season approaches we all have our guys that are going to be the sleeper picks of the century. I drank the Wali Lundy kool-aid last year, I admit it. But how many of the sleepers really pan out. I would tell anyone that would listen that I was hearing info that Travis Henry, the perceived #3, was actually going to be the starter in Tennessee. But even my brother-in-law dismissed me and put his fortunes in the hands of Chris Brown. OUCH! My uber-sleeper last year was Cedric Cobbs (who??). He was a machine at Arkansas and single-handedly beat Texas one year. He was 3rd on the depth chart in Denver due to an ankle injury. That injury was what opened the door for Mike Bell. Being that Shanny would consider putting me in for a game to prove just how great of a running game he has, I started to see the potential. A couple years ago I laughed at the idiot that drafted Rueben Droughns and 4 weeks into the season I was throwing trade offers at him. So last year Cobbs was my sleeper darling. My last two picks in my draft were Travis Henry and Cedric Cobbs but since I didn't have a defense for week one and I had Alexander and Corey Dillon or Thomas Jones for the beginning of the season I decided that Henry was the expendable one because Cobbs was starting to get reps with the first team, and we all love Denver's running game, so there is no way I am going to get into a bidding war for a guy I just drafted and released. As we are all now aware, the results didn't turn out to well but I did undress the last place guy that picked up Henry by later trading him Randy Moss after his only good game.

My point here is that a sleeper is never going to be your #1 guy. I have had some undrafted players become starters (Rudi Johnson and Dominick Davis 2003), but never the guys I drafted late (actually you'll learn of a stud later). Some of these "sleepers" are memorable: you have heard about the RBs last year but did I mention I thought Billy Volek would blow up, before he was traded to become San Diego's clipboard carrier. How about Tatum Bell every year he's been in the league? Could this guy at least tell you what week he's going to actually play well? The only beacon of hope comes from a few years back when I was able to snag McGahee with the last pick in the draft and watched him, Manning and Tomlinson lead me on a second have run to the championship.


The receivers are a whole other level of futility. Last year Michael Clayton was going to burst back on the scene in a big way. And remember Troy Williamson? Yes he still plays in the NFL. He was going to flourish as the #1 guy in Minnesota. What was your favorite Williamson as the #1 moment? Sorry Barreiro, I stole that but you'll never read this anyway. Receivers are tricky because even high picks may tank it on you. But there is hope because powerhouse team I had a few years ago with Manning, Tomlinson and McGahee also had my first ever draft pick from those hated Packers...Javon Walker. That sleeper WR was a great pick because he was big piece of my acquisition of Tomlinson. I finished that season with three rookies out wide: Roy Williams, Lee Evans and Michael Clayton. Those three suited me just fine, but I digress.

The point to all this is that it isn't as cool to say that I drafted Travis Henry as it would have been to say I properly defended my championship. I worried more about wowing people with my keen eye for the late round gem than I did with picking the guys that will carry the bags. So don't be a dumb ass. Put together a list of guys that you know will deliver and never overrate a guy that no one else even knows is in the league because he'll still be there when the drafting's done.

Since my league isn't insane enough to have our draft this early I am not in a position to share my 2007 sleepers just yet. But have no fear because after the draft I will make my predictions known so if you were unfortunate enough to have drafted one of my gems you will still have time to drop them. Go Patriots!

Can you smell fantasy football season?

Over the past few years I have read an insane amount or articles in regards to fantasy football by the so called experts. You catch yourself wondering how such a douche bag could get such a sweet job when he clearly own s a team that finishes last in his league every year. Well I decided it's time for me to offer my sage advice and have it documented so I too can be looked at as one of those idiots that seems to know absolutely nothing. Did I mention that two years ago I took Edge with the third pick instead of Shaun Alexander. edge had a great year but Alexander the great broke the TD record that year. I suppose I should also mention that I drafted Stephen Jackson and Brian Westbrook in the next two rounds and subsequently traded them for Shaun Alexander. So I guess things worked out fine in that regard.

This is just an introductory posting so you aren't going to get much in the way of advice because after all, the season is 4 months away. But feel free to check back, or don't, over the next few months to see what I have to say about rookies, sleepers, busts and break through performers. Last year I picked Stephen Jackson and the year before I tagged Reggie Wayne. So far so good. But just so you understand that I realize I am far from perfect in the ways of fantasy karma, I thought Wali Lundy was going to be a stud last year. You can't win 'em all. Hopefully I can at least offer one piece of good advice to help you earn your entry fee back. Even if no one has an interest in reading this at least it gives me something to do when bored at work or when my wife wants me to help clean up around the house. Go Patriots!